Sometimes I amaze myself...

There are not many things that I am really, really good at. I am adequate at many, decent at some, and good at few. But really, really good? Why, it's almost unheard of. That being said, I have discovered something I am really, really good at.

By this point, we all know I'm excellent at being sick. That basically doesn't even count anymore. However, being sick does play a role in my newly realized talent. So, um, yes. On with it.

I am really, really good at ruining holidays for myself.

Awesome, right? I totally think a $50,000 cash prize is headed my way somewhere in the near future. Although, if this talent is going to win me any contests, I'd better supply something to back my statement up. So here it is, a few of the more recent occasions that I've managed to make miserable:

1. It hasn't happened yet, but this Christmas will suck because I'm sick right now, and viruses generally take me and my incompetent immune system 4-5 weeks to fight off.

2. This past Thanksgiving, I spent the night before throwing up, and the day itself curled up on a couch with no appetite, refusing my grandmother's constant culinary offerings. (which, by the way constitutes an unforgivable crime in her household)

3. Halloween, I sat in my basement with my dog, because I have no friends.

4. My birthday 2005, 2004, and 2003, I was grounded.

5. Last Mother's Day, I slept all day (I was just released from the hospital a day before) and in doing so, convinced my mother that I hated her.

I'm only giving you five, because my skills are getting a little depressing. Happy Kwanzaa. I haven't screwed that one up yet....